Views of Consent

When asking about other students at UIC and their feelings/thoughts on the idea of consent, I asked five females and five males and this was their consensus. To my surprise everyone of them had an exceptional understanding of what consent is. Each one of them proclaimed that consent is a mutual agreement between people that are practicing any type of sexual acts. I’d like to emphasize the word ANY type of sexual act. Consent is used to give permission not just for sex but anything that leads up to it. Things like foreplay, masturbation, and in general touching requires consent. Upon questioning both genders about the different kinds of ways consent can be given all of them had an abundance of answers. One of my favorite responses was that consent is something that should be considered from beginning to end of any sexual activity. To elaborate on this she stated that if either of the partners feel uncomfortable at any point throughout the activities it should stop. “Just because they said yes doesn’t mean you shouldn’t listen to them saying no or stop”. Another response that stuck with me was that body language can be used to give consent. Reading how someone reacts to you touching them can really show if a person is ready or not. If your partner moves closer to you, kisses back, touches back, and reciprocates the same physical energy you are putting out it can be a clear sign of consent. But if the person moves away from you, pushes you away, or creates any type of distance between you it should be a clear indicator that they are not giving consent. Many of the males expressed that consent from males isn’t considered as much as it is from a female. From a males point of view. “I’ve had an instance where the girl wasn’t giving much importance to my comfort throughout the activities.” He stated that she assumed because she was completely ready that he was too and took things way faster than he would’ve liked. When asked how it made him feel he said that he realized consent is important to all sides of the gender spectrum and that everyone should respect boundaries and comfortability of other people. All in all consent is the most important thing when it comes to having sexual activities with anyone. It shouldn’t be something you only worry about because of consequences. Consent is something that should be taken seriously by everyone regardless of gender. Be vary of people’s responses to touch and and verbal communication. Always remember a intoxicated yes is never a sober yes. No means no.